Been far too long. Just to recap: Since the last time I had written anything, I went travelling with my husband for a month to New Zealand, came back to Malaysia, and moved from my parent's house in Kuala Lumpur to a small beach town called Kuantan. And I'm 4 months pregnant!
Everything seems rosy but there's a catch: we are both jobless!
And we have been jobless for ...3 months. Our huge savings account is shriking day after day.
And the job that Im applying for, the lowest of all, called "housemanship" ie a junior doctor's job, according to my likewise friends, is a shitty job. Even fit, young women (who are not pregnant neither are they fasting) are crying,sobbing on how hard the job is. My greatest fear is that I will be called during fasting month.
Well, as you can see, this is a shitty situation of a life. But what am I to do?
I think and I think, and I worry and I worry and you know what???
I decided that I am NOT going to feel sorry about myself. Ever again. From now on until I die.
Do u know its tiring to be negative? And it gets you nowhere! But make us feeling more misrable.
Day in day out I surf the net , (twitter, facebook) and all I see is people complaining. Complaining about how hard their job is, how hard life is, how difficult it is. But few of us really take the time to stop and think positively about our situation.
Lets say in my situation:
My husband and I have only 1 car and we cant even afford to think of buying another until next year. Buying a house? Cant even see the horizon.
Positive: We dont have a cent of debt. We dont even have a credit card! We still have some savings and we work at the same place! Yay.
Housemanship is a shitty job. Will have to stand 12 hours a day. Will be scolded "stupid, asshole" and mistreated. Might not have the time to eat and have enough rest for my little one.Positive: I will be paid close to 5K every month. That is enough money to support my husband and I, and our baby, without dipping more into our savings account. I will find time to eat. I will find time to sit. I will stand up for myself and not let people mistreat me. I will excel and do my best. I will not make excuses. And I will stay away from negative people. I have a wonderful supportive husband who loves me.
I will be scolded for being pregnant during housemanship.
Positive: So what if I am pregnant? I love being pregnant. Its tiring but there is someone growing inside you. A stranger who will love you unconditionally, someone whom you've never met! And some people take years just to get pregnant.
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